“In the midst of winter, I found there was, within me, an invincible summer."*
—Albert Camus, novelist and essayist
If your child came home from school with an unexplained rash that appeared to be getting worse, you would probably bring up the subject and then make a doctor’s appointment.
If your coworker began slurring her words or seemed unsteady on her feet, you would probably express your concern and offer to help.
If your roommate started to oversleep and didn’t make it to work several days in a row, you would probably ask, “What’s going on? Are you okay?”
Why, then, when we notice major signs of emotional distress or intense sadness, do we avoid talking about suicide? We don’t even want to mention the word “suicide.” But, research shows that talking about changes in appearance, ability, or behavior—including directly discussing thoughts about self-harm—does not increase suicidal thoughts or behaviors. It does, however, make it more likely that your child, colleague, or friend will feel supported and cared for. Yes, it might feel a little uncomfortable to ask direct questions, but ultimately it will lead to getting help. It may prevent a tragedy. And that is worth the discomfort you may feel in bringing it up.
Chances are you have been affected by suicide, whether directly or indirectly. Maybe someone you know—a relative, friend, neighbor, or a distant acquaintance—has ended their life by suicide or made an attempt. You have probably heard or read a news story about a writer, actor, comedian, sports figure, or politician that died by suicide. Ernest Hemingway, Robin Williams, Anthony Bourdain, Kate Spade. These are just a few of the hundreds of household names who died by suicide.
By the Numbers
According to the Centers for Disease Control (CDC):
- 48,424 people died by suicide in 2024.
- 14.3 million people seriously thought about suicide.
- The highest completed suicide rates are among Non-Hispanic, Native Americans, including Alaska Natives.
- Males had nearly 4x the completed suicide rates compared to females.
- People older than 80 had the highest suicide rates, with those aged 35–55 not far behind.
- Suicide was the 2nd leading cause of death among people aged 10–24.
Suicide rates are disproportionately higher among certain populations, including veterans, people in rural and poor communities, and those who suffer discrimination (such as LGBTQ+ populations).
But statistics don’t tell the entire story, because every story is real, personal, and shattering to every surviving spouse, relative, and friend. It is a trauma that often casts a dark shadow—not only over the here and now, but over the generations that follow, because we keep silent about it or talk about it only in hushed whispers.
Normalizing the Conversation
Sometimes it’s easiest to talk about suicide when it hasn’t happened or hasn’t happened recently. That is, bringing it up when there is not an immediate need to act or mourn, when it is more distant or an abstract concept, can lead to a calmer, more open discussion and an opportunity to build a supportive alliance. For example, asking your child (in an age-appropriate way), “Are you concerned about any of your friends feeling so sad or lonely that they don't want to live anymore?” While some kids will be willing to share, many will say, ”No.” In either case, bringing up the subject lets them know that no matter what happens and no matter how they are feeling, there is always help available, there is always another road to take and a solution to try, and feelings can change in a minute. Having these conversations more than once will normalize the topic and signal that it is okay to bring up even the toughest subjects and confusing or scary feelings.
In the workplace, it can be especially upsetting when someone attempts or completes a suicide. It may be the result, in part, of losing a job, having money problems, a problem with addiction or another medical condition, not feeling able to cope with professional and family demands, or a serious underlying mental health issue. If you're in a position to notice these patterns across a team—a manager, an HR partner, or anyone colleagues tend to confide in—you don't need to police your organization, but having the knowledge and skills to recognize when someone is experiencing particularly difficult circumstances may help alleviate their pain and despair. Pointing them in the direction of helpful resources, including an appropriate crisis hotline or the company's mental health resources or EAP, is a start.
Warning Signs Worth Knowing
Can suicide be prevented? In some cases, maybe. We have to believe it can. But, in about 50% of completed suicides, there were no obvious risk factors or warning signs. In the other 50%, maybe there were. For example, one or more previous suicide attempts is a major risk factor. So is a history of self-harm, although not all self-harming behaviors indicate a desire to die. Here are some other signs. And although all of these observations may have a reasonable, alternative explanation, do not make assumptions or ignore any of these signs if you spot them:
- Talking excessively about death or wanting to die.
- Expressing feeling trapped, hopeless or a burden to others.
- Isolating from family and friends.
- Expressing feelings of guilt or shame.
- Expressing being in extreme emotional or physical pain, or both.
- Engaging in risky behavior.
- Being extremely pessimistic about the future.
- Giving away belongings or putting affairs in order, such as hastily drawing up a will.
- Increasing use of alcohol or drugs.
- A dramatic increase or decrease in eating and sleeping habits.
It is up to all of us to take steps to reduce the stigma and support support those who feel so hopeless, that suicide seems the only solution. Talking about it is a step in the right direction.
* This quote appears in Camus’s 1952 lyrical essay "Retour à Tipasa" (Return to Tipasa), published in his 1954 collection titled L'Été (Summer)
The views and opinions expressed here are solely those of the author and should not be attributed to Counslr, Inc., its partners, its employees, or any other mental health professionals Counslr employs. You should review this information and any questions regarding your specific circumstances with a medical professional. The content provided here is for informational and educational purposes only and should not be construed as counseling, therapy, or professional medical advice.
“In the midst of winter, I found there was, within me, an invincible summer."*
—Albert Camus, novelist and essayist
If your child came home from school with an unexplained rash that appeared to be getting worse, you would probably bring up the subject and then make a doctor’s appointment.
If your coworker began slurring her words or seemed unsteady on her feet, you would probably express your concern and offer to help.
If your roommate started to oversleep and didn’t make it to work several days in a row, you would probably ask, “What’s going on? Are you okay?”
Why, then, when we notice major signs of emotional distress or intense sadness, do we avoid talking about suicide? We don’t even want to mention the word “suicide.” But, research shows that talking about changes in appearance, ability, or behavior—including directly discussing thoughts about self-harm—does not increase suicidal thoughts or behaviors. It does, however, make it more likely that your child, colleague, or friend will feel supported and cared for. Yes, it might feel a little uncomfortable to ask direct questions, but ultimately it will lead to getting help. It may prevent a tragedy. And that is worth the discomfort you may feel in bringing it up.
Chances are you have been affected by suicide, whether directly or indirectly. Maybe someone you know—a relative, friend, neighbor, or a distant acquaintance—has ended their life by suicide or made an attempt. You have probably heard or read a news story about a writer, actor, comedian, sports figure, or politician that died by suicide. Ernest Hemingway, Robin Williams, Anthony Bourdain, Kate Spade. These are just a few of the hundreds of household names who died by suicide.
By the Numbers
According to the Centers for Disease Control (CDC):
- 48,424 people died by suicide in 2024.
- 14.3 million people seriously thought about suicide.
- The highest completed suicide rates are among Non-Hispanic, Native Americans, including Alaska Natives.
- Males had nearly 4x the completed suicide rates compared to females.
- People older than 80 had the highest suicide rates, with those aged 35–55 not far behind.
- Suicide was the 2nd leading cause of death among people aged 10–24.
Suicide rates are disproportionately higher among certain populations, including veterans, people in rural and poor communities, and those who suffer discrimination (such as LGBTQ+ populations).
But statistics don’t tell the entire story, because every story is real, personal, and shattering to every surviving spouse, relative, and friend. It is a trauma that often casts a dark shadow—not only over the here and now, but over the generations that follow, because we keep silent about it or talk about it only in hushed whispers.
Normalizing the Conversation
Sometimes it’s easiest to talk about suicide when it hasn’t happened or hasn’t happened recently. That is, bringing it up when there is not an immediate need to act or mourn, when it is more distant or an abstract concept, can lead to a calmer, more open discussion and an opportunity to build a supportive alliance. For example, asking your child (in an age-appropriate way), “Are you concerned about any of your friends feeling so sad or lonely that they don't want to live anymore?” While some kids will be willing to share, many will say, ”No.” In either case, bringing up the subject lets them know that no matter what happens and no matter how they are feeling, there is always help available, there is always another road to take and a solution to try, and feelings can change in a minute. Having these conversations more than once will normalize the topic and signal that it is okay to bring up even the toughest subjects and confusing or scary feelings.
In the workplace, it can be especially upsetting when someone attempts or completes a suicide. It may be the result, in part, of losing a job, having money problems, a problem with addiction or another medical condition, not feeling able to cope with professional and family demands, or a serious underlying mental health issue. If you're in a position to notice these patterns across a team—a manager, an HR partner, or anyone colleagues tend to confide in—you don't need to police your organization, but having the knowledge and skills to recognize when someone is experiencing particularly difficult circumstances may help alleviate their pain and despair. Pointing them in the direction of helpful resources, including an appropriate crisis hotline or the company's mental health resources or EAP, is a start.
Warning Signs Worth Knowing
Can suicide be prevented? In some cases, maybe. We have to believe it can. But, in about 50% of completed suicides, there were no obvious risk factors or warning signs. In the other 50%, maybe there were. For example, one or more previous suicide attempts is a major risk factor. So is a history of self-harm, although not all self-harming behaviors indicate a desire to die. Here are some other signs. And although all of these observations may have a reasonable, alternative explanation, do not make assumptions or ignore any of these signs if you spot them:
- Talking excessively about death or wanting to die.
- Expressing feeling trapped, hopeless or a burden to others.
- Isolating from family and friends.
- Expressing feelings of guilt or shame.
- Expressing being in extreme emotional or physical pain, or both.
- Engaging in risky behavior.
- Being extremely pessimistic about the future.
- Giving away belongings or putting affairs in order, such as hastily drawing up a will.
- Increasing use of alcohol or drugs.
- A dramatic increase or decrease in eating and sleeping habits.
It is up to all of us to take steps to reduce the stigma and support support those who feel so hopeless, that suicide seems the only solution. Talking about it is a step in the right direction.
* This quote appears in Camus’s 1952 lyrical essay "Retour à Tipasa" (Return to Tipasa), published in his 1954 collection titled L'Été (Summer)
The views and opinions expressed here are solely those of the author and should not be attributed to Counslr, Inc., its partners, its employees, or any other mental health professionals Counslr employs. You should review this information and any questions regarding your specific circumstances with a medical professional. The content provided here is for informational and educational purposes only and should not be construed as counseling, therapy, or professional medical advice.
“In the midst of winter, I found there was, within me, an invincible summer."*
—Albert Camus, novelist and essayist
If your child came home from school with an unexplained rash that appeared to be getting worse, you would probably bring up the subject and then make a doctor’s appointment.
If your coworker began slurring her words or seemed unsteady on her feet, you would probably express your concern and offer to help.
If your roommate started to oversleep and didn’t make it to work several days in a row, you would probably ask, “What’s going on? Are you okay?”
Why, then, when we notice major signs of emotional distress or intense sadness, do we avoid talking about suicide? We don’t even want to mention the word “suicide.” But, research shows that talking about changes in appearance, ability, or behavior—including directly discussing thoughts about self-harm—does not increase suicidal thoughts or behaviors. It does, however, make it more likely that your child, colleague, or friend will feel supported and cared for. Yes, it might feel a little uncomfortable to ask direct questions, but ultimately it will lead to getting help. It may prevent a tragedy. And that is worth the discomfort you may feel in bringing it up.
Chances are you have been affected by suicide, whether directly or indirectly. Maybe someone you know—a relative, friend, neighbor, or a distant acquaintance—has ended their life by suicide or made an attempt. You have probably heard or read a news story about a writer, actor, comedian, sports figure, or politician that died by suicide. Ernest Hemingway, Robin Williams, Anthony Bourdain, Kate Spade. These are just a few of the hundreds of household names who died by suicide.
By the Numbers
According to the Centers for Disease Control (CDC):
- 48,424 people died by suicide in 2024.
- 14.3 million people seriously thought about suicide.
- The highest completed suicide rates are among Non-Hispanic, Native Americans, including Alaska Natives.
- Males had nearly 4x the completed suicide rates compared to females.
- People older than 80 had the highest suicide rates, with those aged 35–55 not far behind.
- Suicide was the 2nd leading cause of death among people aged 10–24.
Suicide rates are disproportionately higher among certain populations, including veterans, people in rural and poor communities, and those who suffer discrimination (such as LGBTQ+ populations).
But statistics don’t tell the entire story, because every story is real, personal, and shattering to every surviving spouse, relative, and friend. It is a trauma that often casts a dark shadow—not only over the here and now, but over the generations that follow, because we keep silent about it or talk about it only in hushed whispers.
Normalizing the Conversation
Sometimes it’s easiest to talk about suicide when it hasn’t happened or hasn’t happened recently. That is, bringing it up when there is not an immediate need to act or mourn, when it is more distant or an abstract concept, can lead to a calmer, more open discussion and an opportunity to build a supportive alliance. For example, asking your child (in an age-appropriate way), “Are you concerned about any of your friends feeling so sad or lonely that they don't want to live anymore?” While some kids will be willing to share, many will say, ”No.” In either case, bringing up the subject lets them know that no matter what happens and no matter how they are feeling, there is always help available, there is always another road to take and a solution to try, and feelings can change in a minute. Having these conversations more than once will normalize the topic and signal that it is okay to bring up even the toughest subjects and confusing or scary feelings.
In the workplace, it can be especially upsetting when someone attempts or completes a suicide. It may be the result, in part, of losing a job, having money problems, a problem with addiction or another medical condition, not feeling able to cope with professional and family demands, or a serious underlying mental health issue. If you're in a position to notice these patterns across a team—a manager, an HR partner, or anyone colleagues tend to confide in—you don't need to police your organization, but having the knowledge and skills to recognize when someone is experiencing particularly difficult circumstances may help alleviate their pain and despair. Pointing them in the direction of helpful resources, including an appropriate crisis hotline or the company's mental health resources or EAP, is a start.
Warning Signs Worth Knowing
Can suicide be prevented? In some cases, maybe. We have to believe it can. But, in about 50% of completed suicides, there were no obvious risk factors or warning signs. In the other 50%, maybe there were. For example, one or more previous suicide attempts is a major risk factor. So is a history of self-harm, although not all self-harming behaviors indicate a desire to die. Here are some other signs. And although all of these observations may have a reasonable, alternative explanation, do not make assumptions or ignore any of these signs if you spot them:
- Talking excessively about death or wanting to die.
- Expressing feeling trapped, hopeless or a burden to others.
- Isolating from family and friends.
- Expressing feelings of guilt or shame.
- Expressing being in extreme emotional or physical pain, or both.
- Engaging in risky behavior.
- Being extremely pessimistic about the future.
- Giving away belongings or putting affairs in order, such as hastily drawing up a will.
- Increasing use of alcohol or drugs.
- A dramatic increase or decrease in eating and sleeping habits.
It is up to all of us to take steps to reduce the stigma and support support those who feel so hopeless, that suicide seems the only solution. Talking about it is a step in the right direction.
* This quote appears in Camus’s 1952 lyrical essay "Retour à Tipasa" (Return to Tipasa), published in his 1954 collection titled L'Été (Summer)
The views and opinions expressed here are solely those of the author and should not be attributed to Counslr, Inc., its partners, its employees, or any other mental health professionals Counslr employs. You should review this information and any questions regarding your specific circumstances with a medical professional. The content provided here is for informational and educational purposes only and should not be construed as counseling, therapy, or professional medical advice.
%20copy.png)
.png)
